Saturday, September 27, 2014

Jihee Won/ First Draft/ Tuesday 34

My unforgettable moments in Quebec

 

"Hey! I am going to Canada for summer vacation! I'm so excited!"

"Oh really? I envy you! Buy some souvenirs when you are coming back."

When I was 13 years old, I had a chance to go Quebec, Canada for summer vacation. My uncle was living in Canada and he invited our family. Unfortunately, my father had to work so only three of us, me, my little brother, and my mother booked tickets. The first time I heard about this great news from my mother, I called my best friends to boast about this wonderful opportunity. We were leaving four days earlier than my summer vacation starting date, so I had to leave early, leaving my classmates behind, waving hands at me saying "Have a good time in Canada!" It took about 11 hours to get to Quebec. We had to transfer once but without any accident, we safely arrived at Montreal airport, where my uncle and aunt greeted us warmly.

 

   It was midnight when we arrived at his house, so we straightly went to bed. Due to jet lag, when I woke up, it was almost noon. We ate lunch and my aunt took me to YMCA youth center. I was curious so I asked her what the purpose of taking me to this place was. She told me that there will be summer vacation classes for foreign students who wants to learn English, so it will be a good chance for me to improve my English skills and to make some new friends. At first, I was really excited that I could talk with foreigners. At that time, I was attending English speaking academy three times a week, and I was taking higher level of classes than my peers. Native teachers always lauded me for my vocabulary and pronunciations so I was confident about myself. The starting date of the class was tomorrow, so I went downtown to buy textbooks and new T-shirts for my first appearance to new friends.

 

The next day, my aunt drove me to the center, and I went into hall. When I walked in, I was awed by other students' height, which was much taller than me, and their matured appearances. When it was time to introduce ourselves, I was overwhelmed by their clear pronunciations and wanted to go back to Korea right away! After introduction, all of us moved to gym because a instructor named Carla, wanted students to play basketball and kickball as a method to get familiar with each other. Carla was wrong. It was the most terrible time for me because I was not good at playing sports. Everyone was excited.. They jumped, ran, and passed balls to each other. I didn't know even girls were this good at playing sports. I walked out and sat alone on stairs. Suddenly I felt so lonely. In Korea, we play dodge ball in P.E. class and I was a good player so gym classes in Korea was always fun. However, situation was different in Canada. When it was time for lunch, everybody sat down in a circle and took out their meals. There was kimbap in my lunch box. Except me, all the friends prepared sandwiches, donuts, and coffee so it was no wonder that they stared at little Korean girl's strange lunch box. I felt a sense of difference because I was not good at speaking English, playing sports, and also my lunch menu was not same with others. So before afternoon classes, I went into toilet and sobbed. I imagined my first encounter with foreigners to be pleasant but it was not.

 

Three days passed and I was still alone. Everyone was getting familiar except me. No one was interested to me. I sat alone at the bench and finished my lunch. When I read the time on my watch, it was 10 minutes before English grammar class, so I hurried up to the 4th floor, where the classroom was located.

 

When I walked in, a girl came to me and asked, "Hi my name is Ezgi Cetinkaya and I am from Turkey. Can I sit next to you?" I was so happy that someone gave an attention to me, a shy Korean girl. We sat together and when the class was over at 4pm, Ezgi introduced two other friends to me. "This is Esra from Turkey and this is Moerai from Tahiti." We talked until my aunt came to the center to take me to home. I was full of happiness that I made some friends eventually and after several days, we became best friends and went everywhere together. Everyday after class, we went shopping, watched movies, went to amusement park and saw rock band performances. I thought my English skill is getting better and I decided to challenge everyday life. I told my aunt that I will go to the center by myself, using metro. It was a big challenge for me, who was not used to take subway alone even in Korea. Also, I participated actively in classes, even in P.E. class. Though I was not good at playing sports, my classmates passed me balls often to give opportunities for me.  

 

   By the end of summer vacation, I became intimate with everyone in my classroom. We promised to write e-mails to each other when we go back to our home. I still keep in touch with them and they always call me "My little Korean friend". Two months of summer vacation was like a nightmare at first but after all, when I look back these days, it was the most wonderful summer vacation in my lifetime. So I will never my forget memories in Quebec.


 




6 comments:

  1. It is good that you were given the opportunity and grabbed it. I never lived abroad, but just some few-week visits to some countries. I did not really make friends there, because I had so little time. The memories fade, when they are without people and relations. I hope you keep the touch with your friends ever after.

    Lee Jon-ho

    ReplyDelete
  2. To Jihee Won from Haeung Jung(201003223)
    1. What I like about this piece of writing is your writing is very realistic and vivid. I think it's because you mentioned specific name such as Carla.
    2. Your main point seems to be most wonderful memories with your foreign friends in Quebec.
    3. "The next days", "Three days passed" This words are very good to read. I think you organized your essay chronologically.
    4. "So I will never my forget memories in Quebec." I think "So I will never forget my memories in Quebec" is better.
    5. Your writing is very expressive. I hope you keep touch with your friends ever!

    ReplyDelete
  3. 1. What made your experience seem real to me is your detailed description.
    2. But, the place I got confused were
    -“At first, I was really excited that I could talk with foreigners. At that time, I was attending English speaking academy three times a week, and I was taking higher level of classes than my peers. Native teachers always lauded me for my vocabulary and pronunciations so I was confident about myself.”
    The phrase “at that time” is confusing because it might be understood as when you are attending the YMCA youth center.
    -“I asked her what the purpose of taking me to this place was.”
    The word “purpose” does not seem like it came from a small kid. You could just write “why did she take me here.”
    3. Your first paragraph is fine, but I find it is a little bit long. I think you could make it shorter, removing unnecessary information such as why your father could not join with you.
    4. The basic verb tense is past tense and you sometimes changed to past continuous tense, which was appropriate.
    5. Since there was a lot of information, there are no more information that I want to get.

    -Choi Yun-

    ReplyDelete


  4. "Hey! I am going to Canada for summer vacation! I'm so excited!"
    "Oh really? I envy you! Buy some souvenirs when you are coming back."
    When I was 13 years old, I had a chance to go Quebec, Canada for summer vacation. My uncle was living in Canada and he invited our family. The first time I heard about this great news from my mother, I called my best friends to boast about this wonderful opportunity. In my memory, it took about 11 hours to get to Quebec. We had to transfer once but without any accident, we safely arrived at Montreal airport, where my uncle and aunt greeted us warmly.

    It was midnight when we arrived at his house, so we straightly went to bed. Due to jet lag, when I woke up, it was almost noon. We ate lunch and my aunt took me to YMCA youth center. I was curious so I asked her why she took me to the center. She told me that there will be summer vacation classes for foreign students who want to learn English, so it would be a good chance for me to improve my English skills and to make some new friends. At first, I was really excited that I could talk with foreigners. In Korea, I was attending English speaking academy three times a week, and I was taking higher level of classes than my peers. Native teachers always lauded me for my vocabulary and pronunciations so I was confident about myself. Starting date of the class was tomorrow, so I went downtown to buy textbooks. Also I bought new T-shirts and a cap to give a good first impression to new friends.
    ‘Tomorrow is going to be a wonderful day!’ I thought.

    The next day, my aunt drove me to the center, and I went into hall. When I walked in, I was awed by other students' height, which was much taller than me, and their matured appearances. They were not wearing T-shirts with a little bear on it like mine! When it was time to introduce ourselves, I was overwhelmed by their clear pronunciations and wanted to go back to Korea right away! After introduction, all of us moved to gym because a instructor named Carla, wanted students to play basketball and kickball as a method to get familiar with each other. Carla was wrong. It was the most terrible time for me because I was not good at playing sports. Everyone was excited.. They jumped, ran, and passed balls to each other. I didn't know even girls were this good at playing sports. I walked out and sat alone on stairs. Suddenly I felt so lonely. In Korea, we play dodge ball in P.E. class and I was a good player so gym classes in Korea was always fun. However, situation was different in Canada. When it was time for lunch, everybody sat down in a circle and took out their meals. There was kimbap in my lunch box. Except me, all the friends prepared sandwiches, donuts, and coffee so it was no wonder that they stared at little Korean girl's strange lunch box. I felt a sense of difference because I was not good at speaking English, playing sports, and also my lunch menu was not same with others. So before afternoon classes, I went into toilet and sobbed. I imagined my first encounter with foreigners to be pleasant but it was not.


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Three days passed and I was still alone. Everyone was getting familiar except me. No one was interested to me. I sat alone at the bench and finished my lunch. When I read the time on my watch, it was 10 minutes before English grammar class, so I hurried up to the 4th floor, where the classroom was located.

      When I walked in, a girl came to me and asked, "Hi my name is Ezgi Cetinkaya and I am from Turkey. Can I sit next to you?" I was so happy that someone gave an attention to me, a shy Korean girl. We sat together and when the class was over at 4pm, Ezgi introduced two other friends to me. "This is Esra from Turkey and this is Moerai from Tahiti." We talked until my aunt came to the center to take me to home. I was full of happiness that I made some friends eventually and after several days, we became best friends and went everywhere together. Every day after class, we went shopping, watched movies, went to amusement park and saw rock band performances. I thought my English skill is getting better and I decided to challenge everyday life. I told my aunt that I will go to the center by myself, using metro. It was a big challenge for me, who was not used to take subway alone even in Korea. Also, I participated actively in classes, even in P.E. class. Though I was not good at playing sports, my classmates passed me balls often to give opportunities for me.

      By the end of summer vacation, I became intimate with everyone in my classroom. We promised to write e-mails to each other when we go back to our home. I still keep in touch with them and they always call me "My little Korean friend". Two months of summer vacation was like a nightmare at first but after all, when I look back these days, it was the most wonderful summer vacation in my lifetime. So I will never forget my memories in Quebec.

      * I edited my first draft based on comments from classmates. Also I added 2~3 sentences to describe more about my feelings at that time to make readers understand more about my story :)

      Delete
  5. a. What made your experience seem real is your use of quotations.
    b. I was confused by some grammatical errors.
    c. I believe this is a good beginning because the quotations made it interesting.
    d. Her tense was past tense and when she changed it , it was appropriate.
    e. I would like to know if she still stays in touch with the friend she first got close with.
    -201300854 Jieun Kim

    ReplyDelete