Civic Hall
This place is a meaningful and very private place to me. Only one person can be in this place at one time. Other people might be able to be in this place, but it can only be a true meaningful place to me. This place moves when I want it to move and has been with me to many places. This place is the driver's seat of my old car.
Upon entering college my sister gave me her old car because she longer needed a car. My cobalt blue four door Honda Civic sedan was a bit old with a few dents and bruises around the car. My sister put in a few scratches on the front and rear bumpers. While trying to park the vehicle in a tight parking spot she scratched the whole left side of the car. It has bright yellow streak on the side. In the interior it had a full audio system and linen seats. The moon roof made the interior just a little brighter. It wasn't the fanciest car in the world, but I meant a lot to me.
The driver's seat was always clean with no bread crumbs or garbage lying around. The seat was perfectly set for a comfortable cruise. When I sit in the seat, the audio interface is within arm's length reach. The driving experience and the audio is what made this cozy place of mine meaningful. It may only have a volume knob and track skip buttons, but to me it was like the audio interface professionals use at recording studios or concerts. The moment I sit down in my seat I get ready for another meaningful drive.
Every day I would take my car to school and I would always have my phone ready to play music through the audio system. I always made a playlist with songs I knew the lyrics too. Every day driving to school or wherever I would head to, I had a mini concert of my own in my car. No one can hear me, just me and my imaginary fans. Listening and singing by myself in the car relieves all my stress and fatigue. I can be an opera singer and then play the air guitar when I am caught up in traffic. I had my windows tinted so that no one else could see me.
Sometimes when I had a bad day, or just feeling down from the rainy Vancouver weather I would go for drive. Driving down the highway with good music and dark coffee helps me calm down my thoughts. When I am angry and mad it helps me to be patient and understanding. When I am in situation of making decisions, sitting in the driver's seat helps me make wiser choices. It is place where I can express myself and also control my emotions.
It wasn't only music that I listened to. I often listen to hockey games through the radio. I still remember the AM dial. It was AM 1040 Team AM. They would broadcast every home game. Tickets were had to get, so I could not go to many games, but sitting in the driver seat with the broadcast on, it feels just like I was in the arena. When I open the windows and let the cold winter air flow in, it feels like just like the hockey arena. I would cheer when we score and yell when we take bad penalties or get scored on. It was the best seat in the house.
Unfortunately I had to sell the car as I left Canada for Korea, and my self-made concert hall is no longer with me, but luckily my father lets me use his car sometimes. I will never forget all the emotions I let out in that little seat. I hope the new owner of the vehicle can experience all the joy I had experience from that seat.
To Gui Hwan Kim From Han Gyul Kim
ReplyDelete1. I liked the part the writer relieving his stress through driving, listening and singing music. I want to have an experience like that, and to have an outlet for tension and stress.
2. I think the place is described quite clearly. Maybe description about the color of interior or items placed in the car could be added.
3. Sight was the dominant sense in the writing. I liked the part that writer explained about his car’s appearance in paragraph 2 and 3. Every details he used to explain his car like “few scratches,” “few dents,” or “audio interface is within arm’s length reach” gave me a clear image of the car. And the words like “music,” “audio” and “singing” gave me a sense of sound.
4. The place is cozy, private and giving relief. Listening music and singing alone in the place like it will awesome.
5. I think the reason the writer chose this place is he miss it.
6. Maybe you should add what music you liked to listen in the car the most, or the music that reminds you of the place.
1. What did you like best about this essay? Be as specific as possible.
ReplyDeleteWhat I liked best about this writing was the coherence and the descriptiveness of the essay. It was like watching a movie of a man and his car, quite vivid. It made me want to own one.
2. Did the writer describe the place clearly? List any part that were not clear to you. Yes.
3. Did the writer appeal to the different senses? List two sensory details that you especially liked.
Yes, mostly. Did you use any car perfume? How did it smell inside? / a) I had my windows tinted so that no one else could see me. b) When I open the windows and let the cold winter air flow in, it feels like just like the hockey arena.
4. How would you describe the mood or the atmosphere of this place? It seemed like a small, quiet audio room.
5. Why do you think the writer chose to write about this place?
Because he could go anywhere with it allowing him to freely express himself. Also, it allowed him to be more patient and understanding which helped him make wiser decisions.
6. How could the writer improve this essay when he or she revises? Make only one suggestion.
There were some missing words and letters. E.g. “because she longer needed a car.” “I meant a lot to me.” Other than that, it was overall well-written and interesting. Thanks for sharing. :)
CJH
No name, no credit.
DeleteGui Hwan Kim 201100278
ReplyDeleteThis place is a meaningful and very private place to me. Only one person can be in this place at one time. Other people might be able to be in this place, but it can only be a true meaningful place to me. This place moves when I want it to move and has been with me to many places. This place is the driver’s seat of my old car.
Upon entering college my sister gave me her old car because she longer needed it. My cobalt blue four door Honda Civic sedan was a bit old with a few dents and bruises around the car. My sister punched in a few scratches on the front and rear bumpers. While trying to park the vehicle in a tight parking spot she scratched the whole left side of the car. She decorated the side of the car by etching in a bright yellow streak from front to back. The interior was simple, all grey tone, and nothing very special. The seats were grey linen seats with just enough cushioning just enough to prevent bruises while speeding through a speed bump. The seats were old and gave off a vague scent. I call this scent “time” because it was a mix of a lot of smells that have been soaked into the seats over a long period of time. The scent welcomes me when I ever enter the vehicle.
The driver’s seat was always clean with no bread crumbs or garbage lying around. The seat was perfectly set for a comfortable cruise. When I sit in the seat, the audio interface is within arm’s length reach. The driving experience and the audio is what made this cozy place of mine meaningful. It may only have a volume knob and track skip buttons, but to me it was like the audio interface professionals use at recording studios or concerts. The moment I sit down in my seat I get ready for another meaningful drive and another sold out concert.
Every day I would take my car to school and I would always have my phone ready to play music through the audio system. I always made a playlist with songs I knew the lyrics to. Every day driving to school or to wherever I would head to, I had a mini concert of my own in my car. No one can hear me, just me and my loyal imaginary fans. Listening and singing by myself in the car relieves all my stress and fatigue. I can be whoever I want to be. I could exit the parking lot by being Freddy Mercury and then arrive at school as Michael Buble. I listened to all genres of music. I am horrible singer outside of the car, but while driving I sing like a 10 time Grammy Award winning singer. At traffic stops I would use empty water bottles as my microphone and play the air guitar rocking my head side to side. Sometimes when I am excited I am a world famous DJ. The audio buttons and the volume knob is the turn table. I crank the volume up and down to the beat of music imagining I am remixing at a famous club.
Gui Hwan Kim 201100278 (continued from upper reply. The blog does not allow me to post a long blog, so i have to cut it in to two)
ReplyDeleteSometimes when I had a bad day, or just feeling down from the rainy Vancouver weather I would go for drive. Listening to music along with the sound of raindrops hitting the windshield helps me make my day better. When I am angry and mad it helps me to be patient and understanding. When I am in situation of making decisions, sitting in the driver’s seat helps me make wiser choices. It is place where I can express myself and also control my emotions.
It wasn’t only music that I listened to. I often listen to hockey games through the radio. I still remember the AM dial. It was AM 1040 Team AM. They would broadcast every home game. Tickets were hard to get, so I could not go to many games, but sitting in the driver seat with the broadcast on, feels just like I was in the arena. When I open the windows and let the cold winter air flow in, it feels like just like the hockey arena. When a player is on a breakaway I would sway my body side to side just a hockey player would skate. My body would move to wherever the broadcaster said the puck would be. I would sing along to the rants and cheers and yell when our team gets scored on. Sitting the driver seat with cold air and live commentary, I was there at the game.
Unfortunately I had to sell the car as I left Canada for Korea, and my self-made concert hall is no longer with me, but luckily my father lets me use his car sometimes. It was my first car and the most memorable one. I will never forget all the emotions I let out in that little seat. I still have the playlists from those days and still listen to them once in a while. I hope the new owner of the vehicle can experience all the joy I had experience from that seat.